This past weekend was just plain awesome. It was a busy one complete with lots of running around like a chicken with my head cut off, but it was worth it! On Saturday, I attended a baby shower and had way more fun than I usually expect to have at a baby shower. Great company, great food, great cake (not too sweet with a light and delish whipped cream frosting), and great champagne punch that I was definitely not shy about diving into once or twice (ok, so I had about four cups, but they were small cups. Ok, maybe they weren’t that small).
Since I was gone most of the afternoon on Saturday, yesterday was spent completely devoted to my husband and son. We had a lazy morning at home, which consisted of lots of coffee and a new Wii fishing game, and then we went out to lunch at one of our favorite local deli’s, and then to the Connecticut Science Center…one of my son’s favorite spots to go with his Daddy. That’s right, I said his DADDY.
You see, yesterday was only my second visit to the CT Science Center. I went there once with my boys when it first opened, but since then, it has pretty much been designated as a “Daddy’s Day Out” kind of place. The hubster was smart and bought us a membership on our first visit, and it has more than paid for itself. He and my son have been at least a half a dozen times. It’s kind of become their “thing” on weekends when Mommy is occupied with some kind of other adult activity. My tagging along yesterday was a rare exception to this rule. And now I know why.
Ok, it’s confession time. And I’m sincerely hoping that my bloggy sister will forgive me for this one, especially since she and I are actually meeting (WOO-HOO!!!!) this coming weekend at Bloggy Boot Camp and sharing a hotel room!
I’m a pretty cool chick and most people like me (or at least I think so), but in certain situations, I can be kind of a motherbitch. Again, I’m hoping my bloggy sister forgives me for not only admitting that I can be kind of a motherbitch sometimes, but also for borrowing her word for this post.
(My asking for her forgiveness is really just a formality because she is beyond awesome and won’t care that I act like a motherbitch once in a while and she certainly won’t care that I’ve stolen her word. It’s not my first offense, by the way).
Let me go ahead and set the scene for you. The CT Science Center has this awesome new exhibit all about polar bears and penguins and things found in the Arctic. There is even this cool little polar bear’s den that you can crawl into and hide! My son was terrified to go in there because there is also a little button that you push and it makes a sound like a polar bear’s growl. The hubster was another story. All six feet of him crawled into that two foot tall opening. And I think he was pretty psyched about it.
I actually wondered why there weren’t a bunch of kiddos climbing over each other to crawl into this den. It seemed kind of strange to me because I thought that this was the sort of thing that kids would go nuts for. As we made our way to the other end of the exhibit, I figured out the reason for the uncharacteristic lack of children. It was because there was another attraction on the other end of the room that was completely stealing the show. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the penguin slide.
The little guy doing a face plant going down the penguin slide? Yep, that’s my son. The little kid who is pushing him down the slide? Yep, he belonged to some other parent who was nowhere to be seen. And as for the guy in the right corner of the photo who is sort of giving me the evil eye? Yep, that’s the hubster. And he’s giving me the evil eye for a reason. He’s giving me the evil eye because after six years of marriage, there is a certain look on my face that he has come to know and most definitely doesn’t love. I guess it’s the motherbitch look, which basically means that I’m about to have diarrhea of the mouth without giving a flying fig about who hears me.
You can’t see it in the picture because it is hidden behind the hubster, but there is a sign next to the penguin slide that gives the rules for the penguin slide. I don’t remember exactly what they said word for word, but the gist of it was pretty much something like this:
- Remove your shoes
- Only one child at a time on the slide
- No pushing, hitting, shoving, etc. (And if that wasn’t on the list of rules, it really should’ve been).
I really don’t care how square I sound right now, but those rules are put there for a reason. And I’m pretty sure the reason has something to do with the fact that the CT Science Center doesn’t want some huge lawsuit against them because some kid cracked his chin open on the steps leading up to that slide (I witnessed one kid come within an inch of doing just that yesterday). And I guess having that little sign right next to the slide is enough to take the liability off the higher-ups at the Science Center. And I guess that the good folks at the Science Center are operating under the assumption that people will actually pay attention to these rules. And guess what? Most people just don’t give a crap.
First and foremost, I want to state very clearly that I am NOT faulting the kids who were playing on that slide yesterday. Kids are expected to break the rules, because they’re kids and that’s what they do. My problem lies with the parents who either stand there and do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING when their kids are clambering over mine and practically throwing him off the back of the slide so that they can get down it before he does. My problem lies with the parent who wandered off to check out the penguin footprints around the corner and left their kid on the slide as he proceeded to shove MY kid down the slide and almost smashed his face into the fake ice. And don’t even get me started about the parents who don’t make their kids take their shoes off before getting on the slide (Rule #1 people!), not to mention the little girl who failed to remove her shoes and proceeded to go down the slide with a PENCIL in her hand. A PENCIL!!!
Thankfully no eyes were lost at the Science Center yesterday, but I’ll tell you one thing. Everyone in the general vicinity of that slide could hear me talking VERY loudly to my son, making sure that he knew the rules. Here’s a little excerpt.
“Ok sweetheart…YOU are going to wait your turn to go down the slide. Just because SOME people don’t know how to wait THEIR turn doesn’t mean that YOU don’t have to wait YOUR turn. (Hubster was turning red at that point).
“Um…EXCUSE ME….but I think the sign says that you’re supposed to take your SHOES OFF!” ”Um, EXCUSE ME….but you are supposed to go DOWN the slide not UP it.”
“Sweetheart…watch out for these BIG kids because THEY AREN’T PAYING ATTENTION AND WILL CLIMB RIGHT OVER YOU!”
Oh yeah. I was a complete and total motherbitch yesterday. But in my defense, after I saw that one kid almost crack his chin in two, I just got a little nervous. I mean, I was having such a great weekend and really didn’t need a trip to the ER thrown in.
And don’t even get me started on the germs that are probably on the bottom of those kids’ shoes. I’m kind of a germophobe as it is, but throw in the fact that I’m headed to Bloggy Boot Camp on Friday and the fact that there are a million sickies running around this state right now and the fact that I will absolutely throw a toddler-style temper tantrum if one of us gets sick and I have to cancel my trip to Baltimore, and you’ve got yourself one neurotic motherbitch to deal with.
Yeah, I think that it’s probably best to keep the Science Center a father-son activity.
Now that I think about it….I think there was a disclaimer in really small print on that sign by the penguin slide.
“WARNING: The Penguin Slide may cause some seemingly normal women to act like motherbitches. Proceed at your own risk.”
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I really shouldn’t be laughing this hard because I know all too well what you are talking about and how very frustrating it is when people don’t parent their children.
I, too, have been known to throw the MB (motherbitch) card at the slightest provocation another child takes against mine.
Especially since my children cannot verbalize when another child has done or said something mean to them.
I’m like a mother bear on crack watching them, or rather, the other children around them at all times.
Hahaha! I think we’ve all been known to take the motherbitch tone into a full-fledged rant at places where parents are supposed to watch their own kids but don’t. At least I have. Glad your son’s chin and eyeballs are still intact!!
Hey, if someone messes with your kid, you’re allowed to get all motherbitch on them…because you know that any other mom would do it, too! I think you totally hit a nerve with me, because even before I was a mom, I would totally lose it about parents who didn’t enforce the rules and/or make sure their children followed the rules. I can only imagine what our playground experiences are going to be like.
LMAO. Shell will LOVE this post.
I think we all become “that mom” when we witness kids acting like hooligans.
LOL You know I love ya and you can use my word.
I HATE when other parents aren’t paying attention to what their kids are doing and one of my kids end up getting hurt b/c of it.
I’ve been guilty of turning my attention to one of my other kids and then one that I’m not watching does something terrible, but I then apologize profusing and put a leash on said bad child. Okay, not really….
I know I shouldn’t be laughing, but I’ve had that exact talk with my kids the last time we went to the Children’s Museum. There was a group of older kids on a field trip who were picking on my son who was 3 at the time. I turned into a complete motherbitch!
Sometimes, you just HAVE to do it! You know, act like a motherbitch. I think you were completely justified!
If another kid hurts my kid because the other kid is not following the rules AND his/her parent(s) are not around to parent, then watch out–my motherbitch is all over the place. Someone has to look out for the kids, and, if the parents have left it to me by default, then they shouldn’t be surprised if I do not do so pleasantly.
By the way, I think you sound like a great mother–motherbitchiness and all!
Can’t wait to meet you at Bloggy Boot Camp!!!
There’s nothing wrong with that. You have to protect your kid.
I bet she’ll start paying attention when she’s ready to sue because “Johnny” broke something because she wasn’t there to parent him.
Have fun at the conference.
Reading that I am so irritated for you. I would have felt the same way. And my husband would have been giving me the glare too.
Hope you have a great Monday!
When it comes to watching out for my girls the motherbitch in me gets released.
I get so irritated when kids just run free. Ugh.
Have fun at boot camp!! Totally jealous and cannot wait to see pics and hear about it!
I would have, and have in the past, reacted the same way to similar situations.
I tend to be a “motherbitch” only sometimes(?)..but when it involves my kids?!?! Anyone that crosses my kids, best watch their backs as I will drop-kick anyone’s a$$ that dares. Other than that, I am sweet as pie. Very polite. Very quiet. What, you don’t believe me?!?!
from one MB to another…. i’m right there with you honey! nothing aggravates me more than when people set no limits for their kids- especially when it interferes with my child.
Completely, 100% justifiable behavior!! I’m totally a fellow MB and there has been many times when I wasn’t so nice. I’ll be very blunt in telling a child to wait their turn, or follow rules. If their parent isn’t there, or isn’t responsible to speak up then I will gladly. I know as my kiddo’s get older there will be more and more embarrassing incidents, but we’re mama bears and NO ONE messes with our cubs!!
Totally justifiable behavior!! And though I should not be laughing— he he–too funny! I know that my daughter is doomed—between my MB behavior and the teacher in me… ouch.
So funny! I would have been a motherbitch too
Oh I am such a MotherBitch as well! My husband always tells me that he is not fighting on my behalf – I am on my own. Ha ha! whatever!
Half of the time I feel like I’m the ONLY mother out there monitoring her kids to make sure they follow the rules and don’t hurt another kid. It really pisses me off. Guess I’m a motherbitch too.
It is a HUGE pet peeve of mine when other people don’t parent their kids – if anything I think I OVER-parent my kids in public b/c I’m paranoid about being perceived that way.
Oh My God. If I were laughing any harder right this minute I would probably pee my pants. Not because I’m laughing at you but because I am a total motherbitch myself. I jumped all over a 3 year old and his mother at CHURCH becuase the little brat was throwing a friggin BASKETBALL at my 1 year olds head. Some parents just don’t get it. And my husband…well, he has the same look. We must have something eerily in common.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! I loughed out loud at this! SO TRUE!! That’s how I felt at the mall play area in my post called The Parents’ Hypocritical Oath. Oh, the hours I have spent policing other peoples’ kids. It’s exhausting and infuriating, isn’t it???!
I love it…your title alone is hilarious. =) Wish I was going to BloggyBootcamp. =(
I think every intelligent mom has been there at some point! I had a similar instant where an at-least-2-year-old behemoth knocked over my then 13-month old son, HARD. I can’t say that I was able to execute passive-aggression with the same grace that you did, I *may* have let a few choice words fly at the mother who wasn’t paying any attention to her brat while I mopped the blood off my poor baby’s lip.
Those moments of motherbitchery are welcome, necessary, and productive! Keep on keepin’ on!!!!
Oh that’s funny!!! I never realised it before but I’m a complete and utter motherbitch. I often have those conversations with Chick and really can’t comprehend why other Parents don’t keep an eye on their kids???? Enjoy Bloggy BootCamp!
Umm….is it okay to be a motherbitch all the time? Because, yup, that’s me. I can’t stand it when other parent’s don’t pay attention.
I am a motherbitch as well. My husband is on the same page though. I once watched him kick a child out of the mall play area for being over 48″ tall. That’s my man!
You had me rolling! I would have done the same thing too. In fact, last week, I blurted out “How about watching your kid next time?” when some random toddler tried to manhandle my seven month old!
I would have gone into mommy bitch mood too!
These places drive me crazy (almost as much as going to the park) because half of these parents are not paying attention to their kids, they are on the phone, texting, chatting it up with another parent, I think I have seen it all. And its such an awkward position to be put in when some other kid whacks your kid on the head with something or climbs over the top of them and there is not a parent in sight. I have been known to blurt out a rant almost verbatim.
Where exactly is that place? I don’t live too far away, I don’t believe, and would love to take my kids there.
Anyway…
I agree. I took my kids to this play place around here and the age for the play place is toddler – 7 ONLY. Even kids over a certain height can’t go in there.
My daughter was 3 at the time and she was playing in there with her friend when I see this kid who must have been 11. Granted, he did have a little sister there, but he shouldn’t be in the play area. I see his parents sitting on the side completely not even paying attention when the kid goes down a small slide and kicks my daughter RIGHT in the side of the face. He laughed and ran away while my daughter, crying hysterically, comes running over to me.
I went over to that kids’ parents and let them hear it. All the while, the kid said “It wasnt me” and the parents scolded me for accusing their son. Excuse me? I didn’t leave my 3 yaer old there alone, I was right by her the entire time.
I cussed that woman out so badly before I left. It felt good too.
Hahaha! I’m seeing Shell’s word everywhere now! I love it. And what a cute little blog you have. Yeah, umm, I would have stalked that kid back to his mom and went motherbitch on her.
That place sounds great! Where in CT is it? I hate when parents just let their kids run around not following the rules. There is an indoor playground at the mall near my house and my daughter got pushed off the side of the slide because some little punk kid (funny calling a 4 yr old a punk but that’s what he was like) was going up and just pushed her so he could get to the top. Of course, his mom was no where around.
I love the pic! It was great meeting you this weekend. Your blog is awesome.
I would have reacted the same way!
girl, i can barely be nice to my own kids let alone someone else’s. i get it. i SOOOOOOOOOOOOO get it
I just LOVE you!! I am a first time reader of your blog and you and I would SO get along! I am the same way when it comes to diarhea of the mouth and I have embarrased my hubby on MORE THAN ONE occasion! I would have done the EXACT same thing!! You go girlie!!
LMAO! YESSS I’m the exact same way.. my husband knows “the look” all too well! We hate when parents don’t do their job and watch their kids. That’s one of the reasons why my kids don’t play at the McDonald’s playground or any park that has a lot of kids.. and let’s not get started on the germs… BLEH!! :/
ROFL!! The Motherbitch. That is a good one. We have an awesome kid museum like this here in Dallas too. And I am forever turning into a psychopath as well while I attempt to chase my children around, keep them free of germs, and free of getting trampled or launching themselves off some high surface they were never meant to be on in the first place. I think you did pretty good, btw.
Wow. I like to take my kids to these kinds of places so I don’t have to entertain them myself and can actually have a break from dealing with them every second for a few hours. I generally feel that breaking the rules is what kids do and kids in general just have to learn how to deal with it without their parents always butting in. I am certainly not advocating serious physical harm come to any child but bumps, bruises, cutting in line etc are part of being a kid and sheltering them from that is doing them no benefit in the long run. I know my son likes to roughhouse and someone else’s kid may get hurt or upset, but that’s what boys do when they play together, if your kids can’t hack it, keep them home.
That’s hilarious. Thanks for the laugh this morning. Somehow I can totally picture you.
Thanks for letting us know who the hubs was cause I was thinking who’s that dude and what is his deal. I totally understand now having experienced the same look here and there.
MOTHERBITCHES!!!
::fuckingdeaderthanthedeadest::
this is my new favorite term.
Love it- this is where you and I are alike- Jake loves to roughhouse, but knows where and when to do it…he also knows when to wait his turn and I will help make sure he knows that everyone gets a turn when we’re out at places! Way to go Mary! Keep raising him right
I have to say I don’t agree with comment #40. That attitude is how this society has come to where it is, in terms of bullying. “Boys will be boys” is outmoded and irresponsible. Breaking the rules is not “what kids do” if we are trying to raise them to be part of this world. I believe that teaching limits and boundaries are just one part of being a loving parent.
Whoa #40 (AMG). I hopefully never come across you or your child, otherwise my motherbitch will totally come out.
You may believe that boys play rough and it’s okay to hurt someone or upset their feelings, I do not. And I would guess that many other parents feel more like me than you.
You are doing your child absolutely no favors by allowing them to bully. And that’s exactly what that is. BULLYING.
Wow, with your comment from number 40. Sure kids like to play around, but there are rules for a reason. It’s also not acceptable to go to a public place and let your children run free without supervising them. It’s your job as a parent to make sure they are not harming other kids. Good for you mama for keeping your kids safe.
Chuck e Cheese brings out this side in me. Lazy parents who don’t want to take care of their children. We all appreciate having a break, but a public place is not the appropriate time to take such a break.
I think that these places are for fun and not to be used as babysitting services. I shouldn’t have to patrol someone else’s brats because their mom wants a break. My kids should not have to worry about bodily harm or being pushed around (physically or otherwise) because “kids will be kids.” Our kids act (in large part) based on what parents allow and advocate. Unfortunately, it’s this “I’m gonna let everyone else take care of my kids while I take a breather” mentality that ruins these kinds of places. If someone else’s kids aren’t being taught manners, maybe THEY should stay home. Just my thoughts.
As the mother of three boys, I hate the phrase “boys will be boys.” Its not an excuse for allowing inappropriate behavior. Do my boys roughhouse? Absolutely. But, I also can’t let them hurt other kids. They’ll grow up and be bullies. These places are ones where parent supervision is required. Knowing this, sometimes I will just take 1 or 2 of my boys at a time, so that I can monitor and teach them the proper way to behave.
I think that you were absolutely correct to make sure that your son knew the rules and followed them. The person who commented (I think it was #40) that roughhousing and breaking rules are a way of life for kids, especially boys, needs a reality check. I’m not trying to start anything here, but seriously! One of the best things a parent can do for their child is to make sure that the kid knows how to follow the rules. Yes, there is a time and a place for roughhousing. Yes, children (and adults) will break rules. Yes, to an extent it’s acceptable, even expected. However, in a public place among strangers, following the rules and acting like humans, as opposed to animals, is expected and proper, or at least it used be and should still be. It’s called common courtesy, people! One of my biggest gripes is that public places designed for people to go and enjoy themselves (usually at a monetary cost) are not as enjoyable as they could and should be, because there are other people who feel that it’s okay to be rude and break the rules designed for not only everyone’s safety, but also everyone’s good time. ARGH! Okay, that’s enough out of me on that subject because I could seriously go on and that would be wrong …
As always, loved the post and look forward to the next one!
Comment #40 is the epitome of why I hate these types of places. Because these parents think that this is their time out. Time away from their responsibility and actions of their children. Rules are put in place for the safety of ALL children. Allowing your child to “break the rules” because “boys will be boys” is just irresponsible parenting.