10 Reasons Why Moms Need Wine

Yesterday was a really rainy day here in Connecticut. Actually, it’s been a pretty rainy week. And when it rains, kids fill up with energy and reach a certain point where they pretty much explode. And for me and two of my good girlfriends, our four boys (combined) hit that point at about 4:00pm yesterday.

What started as an innocent play date and hopefully some much-needed socialization for us mommies turned into a full on crying and screaming fest on the kids’ part. And then somewhere during that play date, each one of us three women announced that we would be pouring a FAT glass of wine after it was all said and done.

Because moms NEED wine. And here are 10 reasons why:

1. We’ll start with what set us off yesterday…incessant crying and screaming. Why kids don’t realize that getting louder and screaming and crying only makes the moms want to ignore them and go hide in a closet is beyond me. I don’t care who you are and how calm of a mother you claim to be. Crying and screaming is annoying as hell. And we deserve a glass of wine after having to endure it even for five minutes.

2. Wine time usually means adult time. And adult time is pretty freakin’ awesome. The end.

3. I learned soon after my son was born that he wasn’t the only one that needed a pacifier. And vino is my version of a binky. It calms me down. It shuts me up. And it helps me sleep through the night.

4. You know how they tell you if you’re about to lose your temper you should take a deep breath and count to ten? Well, it only takes me about ten seconds to open a bottle of wine, so by the time I’m finished counting, I’ve already got the damn bottle open so I might as well have a glass. It’s a double whammy, and I dig it. And it definitely helps my temper.

5. Boogers, poop, and ass-wiping are part of our job. And we deserve to be rewarded for going above and beyond with our efforts. Nuff said.

6. Going back to the noise factor, we’ve usually had to deal with “whine” all day. And the only way to chill out after dealing with “whine” is to pour a glass of “wine.” It almost makes you wonder where they came up with the name.

7. Sucking back wine stops me from talking for a few seconds and having to say, “No!” “Stop it right now!” “Mommy said don’t touch that!” “Get your finger out of your nose!” “Quit playing with your wiener!” etc. It gives my poor kid a break. (Remember that I said that wine time usually means adult time. There are exceptions to this rule).

8. Having a glass or three of wine before the hubster gets home from work makes the whole June Cleaver thing so much easier. “How was your day, dear?” (Sip, gulp, sip). “Come over here and sit next to me and put your feet up…you’ve had a long day.” (Gulp, gulp, guzzle). “You just relax while I go make dinner!” (Hell, the bottle is in the kitchen, so I can refill a couple times and he won’t even notice).

9. Wine gives me something to look forward to when I’ve had “one of those days.” Actually, it gives me something to look forward to no matter what kind of day I’ve had. And yes, I know that it sounds a bit pathetic and desperate that I look forward to my evening vino ritual so much, but I don’t give a shit.

10. Honestly, do I really even need to come up with a valid 10th reason for why moms need wine? I love it, and I want it, and it’s almost 5 o’clock right now and I should really be getting ready for wine time instead of typing this blog post. That’s reason enough.

Mommyologist Loves Wine

True Love

Cheers!

Comments

  1. 52
    Heather says:

    I saw the word, “wine” in the title of this post and I had to read it. I will remember these the next time my husband rolls his eyes at me as I pour a glass.
    Better yet I will just print this post and paste it to the wine fridge the husband got me for Christmas!!

    It is nice to meet you. I can’t wait to read some of your other posts.

  2. 53
    Stefanie says:

    …hmmm it’s only 12:30 here… think it’s too early to jump on/off the wagon :)

    Ps. Happy SITS day!

  3. 54

    I’m with most of that other mamas on #3 being my favorite reason. We all need our “soothers” right?

  4. 55
    Kriste says:

    LOVE IT! I have 2 teen girls, I need all the wine I can get.

  5. 56
    Kelly says:

    First time reader from SITS. This is an AWESOME post, and pretty much my mission statement. *cheers!*

  6. 57
    JD says:

    Found you via SITS!
    I sometimes wonder what it would be like to not have a glass of wine at 5pm every day. Then I laugh at the ridiculousness of the thought and take a nice, long sip.

  7. 58

    This post is outstanding! LOVE.

  8. 59

    So it’s not just me…

    And following on from point 1, why does my son thinking screaming will make it quicker for Mum to get the baby to go to sleep?

    Stopping by from SITS!

  9. 60
    Jolene says:

    LOVIN this blog!!! I’m a fan of the wine myself….especially when all 5 kids are under the same roof and I had one of the longest days at work!!

  10. 61
    Kristi says:

    You are so my people. I have 3 girls who are 6, 4 and almost 3. I want wine every day. I try not to have it every day so I don’t look like I’m developing a problem. Most days I lose that battle. All I can say is I don’t go through an entire bottle every day, so that’s good right? It’s too bad you live on the east coast, because you sound like someone I could totally hang and have wine with every night. Check out my blog if you get a chance. You’ll see what I mean. http:/www.poopinginpeace.blogspot.com/

    • 62
      The Mommyologist says:

      I am so glad you understand where I’m coming from! I will check out your blog for sure…LOVE the title!

      • 63
        Marguerite says:

        I just wanted to say: I Love my wine! I don’t drink wine just because they say it is good for you because you can’t beleive everything you hear and half of what you see. I drink it because it relaxes me…and relaxation is good for the health alone.

        As for as it being good for other things like your heart etc. that remains to be seen. So i thought i would test it out for myself just to see what would happen if i drank wine everyday for a couple of month right before i got my blood work. Of course i was terrified of what the results would be. my doctor called me in after receiving the results of my blood work back because she was concerned about something.

        When i got into her office she told me that my hemoglobin levels were low and that was because i wasn’t eating enough green veggies. she also said all of my other levels was perfect…my cholesterol, thyroids etc.. She said; “I don’t know what you are doing but keep doing it”. Now that’s the proof in the pudding. I LOVE MY WINE.

  11. 65
    Jessica says:

    Your appreciation for wine time makes me feel like I’m not alone… Ahh, how I look forward to my evening ritual as well. Until I get pregnant again, then I have nothing to look forward to. :)

  12. 66
    judes says:

    I enjoy Wine-ding down every night. I very rarely get sick with colds, flu and such and I tell everyone the secret is wine and vitamins. One of my co-workers said “screw the vitamins!” LOL

  13. 67
    Heids says:

    Love this list. I’ve had a week off of drinking while trying to “eat healthy” and keep tabs on what I’m eating and drinking – and am SO happy have had a glass (2, in fact, so far – 125 calories, 4 carbs each – much better than a beer or mixed drink!) tonight, that I even googled “I love wine” (ah, the things we do when everyone else has gone to sleep!). Wine has gotten me through MANY an after-a-crazy-day-with-kids meal preparation (hmm, I thing that means I either love cooking or HATE it). I love #8 – it makes it easier to be nice to hubby and sneaking off to the kitchen for more. Then being shocked later when the bottle is empty so soon! And #1, when the kids were little, in no time at all a group playdate (moms and kids) would spiral into wonderful pandemonium. I think my husband was often amused to come home and find the house full of kid and moms who were having so much fun (kids unsupervised in one room, moms drinking wine in another!). Hmm, I guess I should share some of my wine with him . . .

  14. 68
    kay kline says:

    Lol this is such a great post!! And so true, I love it!!!

    ^

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