Planes, Trains, and Hurricanes. And Shit in My Basement.


Where do I begin?

If you’re wondering why I can’t form a coherent sentence at this point in time, it’s probably because I have no idea if I’m coming or going. Seriously…what state is this? Where do I live?

And why the hell aren’t the lights on?

Last Thursday, I drove up to Boston to spend the night at the airport before flying to Los Angeles the next morning for the kick-off event for ConAgra’s Child Hunger Ends Here campaign. I’d been looking forward to the trip for weeks, and even though Hurricane Irene (a.k.a. the most UN-Mom Sexy bitch I’ve ever met) was hot on my heels and threatened to cancel my trip, the hubster assured me that things would be fine at home and that I should just get on the plane the next day and go.

And so I did.

And when I landed in LA, I got a nice email from the airline informing me that my flight back to Boston had been canceled.

And then I got my mom on the case, because she’s retired from said major airline, and she called her good friends who still work for said major airline and they were able to get me confirmed on a flight back to Pittsburgh the next day after the event, where I hunkered down with my 91-year old grandfather for two days until I could return to Boston last night.

The event in LA was great…and I will be blogging about it later this week. In the meantime, here’s a little snapshot for ya.



Yeah…that’s Mark Salling from Glee. And this was the only photo of “he and I” that I was able to have taken because right after it was taken, I had to haul my ass back to the Roosevelt Hotel and get in a cab to the airport.

And after I boarded my flight out of LA and we started to taxi down the runway, I breathed a sigh of relief that I’d be getting back home to my family instead of being stranded in an airport for days.

I fly a lot. And I love to fly. But because I fly a lot, I also know when something doesn’t feel or sound right with the airplane. And the 757 I was riding on started down the runway, and took off in like eight seconds, which just seemed WAY too early to me. And it seemed WAY too early to the dude sitting next to me too because he looked at me and commented on how short the take off was.

And then the plane did this weird thing and made this strange noise and I thought we had stalled and were about to go into the Pacific Ocean. And I totally almost grabbed the dude next to me to hang on for dear life. But then the throttle kicked back in, and I realized that even though we’d flown out of LAX, we had done a “John Wayne take off” for some reason. And if you don’t know what a “John Wayne take off” is, then google it. I really don’t have the energy to explain it to you.

After the crazy take off, I made friends with the dude sitting next to me. And I told him that while I’d had fun in LA, I was definitely an East Coast girl, and I told him that I felt like I stuck out like a sore thumb in LA and had “East Coaster” written on my forehead.

And then he looked at me and said, “That’s because of the way you talk.”

And I wasn’t sure whether or not to take that as a compliment or an insult, especially since this dude had also laughed out loud when he asked what I did for a living and I told him I was a blogger.

Whatever…he totally thought I was legit by the end of the flight and we wound up being buds for 2 1/2 hours till we landed in Dallas.

My flight from Dallas to Pittsburgh took off without a hitch, I landed there fine, and took the train over to baggage claim. And I had a great time there hanging out and talking to my grandfather and other family members for two days.

And then the call came from home that my husband and son had been out of power since Irene hit…and that our basement was flooding with water and sewage.

SEWAGE. As in SHIT. As in there were TURDS floating around in my basement.

My parents thankfully had their power restored, and they watched our son while my husband cleaned up the shit. And then I FINALLY made it back to Boston last night and drove home to CT, and now we are all officially camped out at my parents until our power comes back on.

Did I mention that there was SHIT IN MY BASEMENT?

Needless to say, I’m all out of sorts and my routine this week has literally GONE IN THE SHITTER.

Please send good vibes for the power to come back on soon…and for my home to remain SHIT FREE for a while.

Oh yeah, and feel free to send wine or other booze as you see fit.




  1. 1
    Krista says:

    Oh shit! That is no good. No good at all. “Sorry” seems so inadequate a response to you having shit in your basement, but tha’t all I’ve got. Much sympathy for you.

  2. 3
    Tiffany says:

    Holy crap!!! That really stinks big time! Literally and really. Sorry, I had to “go there”. So how does one person remove the poo and smell and bacteria from the basement? Isn’t that like a biohazard? Aside from the poo, glad to hear that you made it back with your husband and son and have been able to house up with family. Stay safe!

  3. 5
    Dorie says:

    What a shitty situation to be in!! You always make me laugh!!

  4. 7
    Evonne says:

    Wow, what a shitty story! Sorry, just trying to make you laugh.

    I don’t like it when my son somehow manages to get shit all over the bathroom. I can’t imagine a basement full of it. Ick!! I hope that never, ever happens again and you get your power back soon.

  5. 11

    That sucks! I have never had a sewage backup but I know several people that have. Hopefully you won’t have to deal with any shit (in your house) for a VERY long time!

  6. 13

    I live in south Florida, so listening to all of these hurricane stories from you northerners is giving me a laugh…
    but shit in the basement does suck..

    • 14
      The Mommyologist says:

      I hear ya…it’s like when people down south talk about an inch of snow like it’s a blizzard! LOL
      The shit is definitely not a good thing…

  7. 15
    amber says:

    Well, at last you didn’t have to see the shit floating around down there? That sucks though.

  8. 17
    Minivan Mama says:

    Well, that’s all really shitty! Good vibes being sent your way! Hope it all gets better soon!

  9. 19
    Aunt Crazy says:

    OH MY HELL, this made me laugh so hard and then cry because it brought back the memories of the several months in my life when our septic system was all messed up and shit would back up into my bathtub, you know the place I bathed my children daily! Yep, gross, and I should OWN Lysol after those few months…

  10. 21

    Oh man. That really sucks. I would definitely have to have the husband clean up that mess because I would NOT. Glad you made it there and back safe and sound!

  11. 23
    Jessica says:

    Oh wow–thats crazy. I for sure wouldn’t be touching any shit–thats what we have husbands for, right?! Glad you werent stuck in LAX with Lindsay Lohan. Although, maybe you could have snuck into the VMA’s? That would have been a pretty rad blog post!

    • 24
      The Mommyologist says:

      The VMAs were going on right across from where I was staying! Definitely would have been fun to see people!

  12. 25
    Shell says:

    What a weekend, girl!

    Sorry the hurricane made your trip even crazier!

    And SHIT???? OMG.

    I hope you get your power back soon!

  13. 27

    Oh dude!!! BUMMMER! SHIT in your basement sounds AWFUL.

    This is another reason you should move to CA! Sending you lots of WINE! Did you see my wine news by the way!!!!???! Probably not since you have been on trains, planes & had shit in your basement.

  14. 29
    kim says:

    holy shit! what a shitty situation to be in! i bet no one had a shit eatin’ grin cleaning that shit up! talk about piling shit onto an already shitty shituation! that shit just stinks! 😉

  15. 31
    Rebecca says:

    Was thinking of you. We totally lost power for a few days but thankfully it’s restored. Irene rocked the state! I was going batty and so were the kids. Glad you made it back safe and sound. All the best!
    Seriously, hope your basement makes a full recovery, that’s just nasty. I saw a guy on the news swimming in the flooded waters in a street in the city. Wonder if he ever thought of sewage he was also swimming in. EWWW!

    • 32
      The Mommyologist says:

      AHH!!!! SO gross. I can’t believe we JUST got power back today!!! Glad to hear that you are ok too!!

  16. 33

    Even with sh!t in your basement, you life sounds hella fun. I am sending the power and light fairy to sprinkle magic energy dust over your house.

    • 34
      The Mommyologist says:

      I’m definitely finding the humor in the whole situation!! We finally got our power back…yay!!

  17. 35

    Oh no! So sorry Mary. Sending good thoughts and vibes your way.

  18. 37

    Sounds like a whirlwind! Can’t wait to see the pics, and hoping you get power back soon. My parents (in CT) were saying that things still kinda messy there!

    • 38
      The Mommyologist says:

      Some people here still don’t have power, but thankfully we have ours back now. SUCH a mess. I don’t think that I am cut out for grinder pumps and raw sewage. I’m just not that kind of girl. 😉

  19. 39

    I was expecting more to happen on that plane after the crazy lift-off, but I’m so glad it didn’t!!!! I never talk to people next to me on the plane. I’m bad that way!

  20. 41

    so sorry about the shit storm in your basement, and here’s another vote for hurricane irene as the most un-mom sexy bitch ever.

  21. 43

    oh wow. after all that – that’s all i’ve got. that’s just crazy. the plane thing was enough and your basement was the icing on the cake. sending all kinds of good vibes your way!

  22. 45
    Robin says:

    Oh my god, you poor thing. I can’t even imagine having to deal with that. What a mess.

  23. 47
    Marta says:

    That really sucks. At least you got to hang out with the young hot and famous before having to head back and deal with shit (literally).

  24. 49
    Kristin says:

    Seriously…I don’t know what I would have done, other than to say, “Holy Shit!” and then cried…and honestly, your husband is a rock star for cleaning that up. Mine is super handy, but there a few things he won’t do…shit is one of them! Glad you’re power is up and running, hopefully everything is on the up and up!

  25. 51

    Oh geez…shit in your basement…I gagged at the thought! Your husband rocks for cleaning it up!

    I love to fly too, but I hate to talk to other people. Don’t worry about it being a compliment or an insult…just be proud to be an East Coast girl…we rock!

  26. 53
    Theta Mom says:

    Holy CRAP – on so many levels girl!! Sorry to hear about your basement, that really stinks <—-OMG, was that totally lame? 😉 Glad to hear you are all safe, Irene totally sucked it. My parents beach house has over 2 ft of water. It's a frackin nightmare.

    And the flight drama you experienced? I would have needed oxygen.

    Hope by the time you read this comment you have power and I'm sending you booze girl – after THAT week, you need it!!


    • 54
      The Mommyologist says:

      OMG…that is so awful about your parents’ beach house! I know this storm could have been much worse, but she was definitely still a pain in the neck! So happy that Hurricane Katia took a turn out to sea!!

  27. 55

    Good god! That’s the worst story ever! And now I need to google that take off…
    Hope you have power and are getting back to normal…

  28. 57

    OMG how am I just reading this now!? Thats terrible! I hope that by now things are better and less “stinky” over at your place!

  29. 59

    That totally sucks. Like, big time. Ugh… poor thing. Sending good vibes your way, Love. On another note, looks like you had a good time in LA. #SilverLining….????

  30. 61
    Guerrina says:

    Oh, nasty! Irene took out my power Saturday night before she formally arrived and I finally got it back this past Friday. What an adventure! My home sits below the sewer line so we have a monster pump that shoots everything out to the line. Guess what? No power = No pump = no pee! Like I said, an adventure! Glad you had somewhere to go and had a great trip to the West Coast!


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