The Elf On The Shelf: (a.k.a. The Sleep Nazi)

Were you or are you still a hard-core Seinfeld fan?

I am.

I LOVE that shit. And if you don’t, then the only excuse I’ll accept is that you’ve never seen one episode in your entire life. If you have seen it and don’t think it’s funny, then I don’t think that you are freakin’ funny either.

Ok, changing subjects for a minute…

Last night, the Elf on the Shelf returned to our house for the season. “Elfie,” as my son named him last year, showed up at our front door perched up on a miniature pumpkin. (And no, I haven’t taken down the Halloween decorations nor have I put the Christmas decorations up yet. Mama’s been a little preoccupied with power outages and total displacement).

I wasn’t sure that little dude would fall for it, but after the hubster dug Elfie out of the basement, situated him on the front porch, and rang the doorbell, little dude opened the door and was literally squealing with excitement that Elfie had flown in from the North Pole and graced our family with his presence once again. I have to admit, it was pretty damn cute.

We placed Elfie on the mantle, and then after little dude went to bed, I moved him to another spot. (Because any of you who have the Elf know what happens the next morning if you forget to move him to a new location).

Ok, cue the Seinfeld reference, because instead of referring to that little fu%&er as Elfie, I’m now referring to him as “The Sleep Nazi.”

(No, I’m not an asshole. I know that on Seinfeld it’s “The Soup Nazi.” Just shut up and keep reading).

This morning right around 6am, I was awoken by a loud little voice speaking directly into my ear….”Hey Mommy!!! Can you BELIEVE that Elfie came back? I can’t wait to see where he is this morning!”

Did I mention that it’s still dark at 6am during this time of year in CT?

I managed to convince little dude to lay in my bed with me till 7am, which he interpreted as meaning he could roll around in the bed and make me seasick for an hour.

We finally came downstairs, and he was thrilled to find Elfie sampling the leftover Halloween candy.

 

elf on the shelf

 

Look at the expression on Elfie’s face. Do you hear what I hear?

“NO SLEEP FOR YOU!”

 

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