I’ll Blog When I Damn Well Wanna Blog

No, you aren’t hallucinating, I’m actually writing a blog post for the first time in over a month. Yes, I know I’ve been totally slacking at filling your head will all sorts of inappropriate f-bombs lately — but I swear, I’ve had a totally good reason for being virtually non-existent.

As most of you already know, I started working full-time again as a Staff Writer for The Stir almost six months ago — and it’s the first full-time job I’ve had in over six years — since before my son was born. Sure, I freelanced the hell out of some shit for the past two years, so working “again” shouldn’t have come as any big shock — but when I freelanced, I wasn’t FULL-time. (I was also basically broke, but that’s neither here nor there.)

And while the past six months have definitely been a huge transition for me and my new working woman status has taken some getting used to, I’m happier and more fulfilled than I’ve been in a long time. I work for an insanely great company with co-workers who amaze me everyday with their wit, amazing writing skills, and down-to-earth-ness — and I think it’s safe to say that all of them will totally understand where I’m coming from when I say that if you’re a full-time writer, it’s kind of hard to go home and write some more at the end of the day.

I love this blog — I really do. It’s my baby. It got me thinking again. It got me sharing my life’s moments with someone other than myself. And most importantly, it got me writing and put me back on track to finding my identity in life.

But now that I’m feeling redefined, I also find myself having less and less extra time to sit down and blog as “The Mommyologist,” and I also find myself feeling a bit conflicted as to how this blog is supposed to evolve now that my son is getting older. And I KNOW there are plenty of other bloggers who are in the same boat as me and aren’t really sure how to proceed as they enter the next phase of their kids’ lives.

My son is 6-years-old now, and he’s such an amazing little individual. I repeat, he’s an INDIVIDUAL, and I’m starting to feel conflicted about sharing too much about him online. Sure, when he was little, it was harmless enough to talk about him shitting in First Class while sitting on an airplane in D.C. on the middle of a live runway. But now? I feel like I owe him a bit more privacy & respect — and he also knows how to read now, so I’d be mortified if he passed by the computer, saw a post, and found out he was the subject of blog fodder.

And let me venture back to the whole full-time job thing one more time. Now that I work what are pretty much considered to be “normal” business hours — when I’m not working, I want to be spending time with my little dude and doing fun things with him instead of blogging about all of the funny things he does. (Damage control note — I’m talking about my own, personal situation, not yours. I’m not insinuating that you are neglecting your child by blogging, so save any attacks or shitty words for another one of my posts, please.)

Ok, enough rambling — here it is, folks. My life has changed, my priorities have changed, and while I’m not sure exactly what the future holds for The Mommyologist, I’ll leave you with one final statement:

“I’ll blog when I damn well wanna blog.”

(And those of you who are truly my friends will understand my feelings 100% and won’t have to question them, call me a sell-out, or tell me I’m making a huge mistake by not devoting every ounce of energy I have into cranking out posts for the sake of cranking out posts. BTW — I LOVE ¬†and RESPECT those of you who truly “get it” so very much. Your support means more than you’ll ever know.)



  1. 1
    Mimzy Wimzy says:

    I get it. I’m going through so much drama lately that I just have nothing I can write about that wont cross the line into things I am not legally able to share. It sucks. It is my life. It is consuming my life. Instead, I keep it all in and I’m about to lose my mind. So… I understand that you are going on with your new life situation & enjoying your free time with your son. I applaud you!

    • 2
      The Mommyologist says:

      That is so hard when you want to write, but have to keep things in. I hope that things start looking up for you very soon!!

  2. 3
    Kim says:

    I LOVE this post! I love my blog as well (it is no where near as amazing as yours, but it still is one of my “happy places” to go and write), but I work full time as well, and have a 3 year old, so I find it really hard to blog as much as I would like. I completely understand wanting to come home after work and spend time with your little dude. They are amazing. And they grow so fast we don’t even realize it – I know, I know, its cliche, but its true! So enjoy that time, plus you need a little “wine” time as well ;) I enjoy your blog, so I will continue to be a dedicated reader, no matter how much time passes between posts! Until next time.. :)

    • 4
      The Mommyologist says:

      Thank you! Going to do my best not to disappear completely, but trying to be realistic and get my priorities in line, etc. Sometimes it can just be so hard to find a balance to everything!!

  3. 5
    Mary says:

    As Doris Day would say, Ksarah sarah

  4. 6
    Glamamom says:

    Thrilled to read the new job is treating you well! I had a feeling it was going to be the right fit for you.

    Blogging is a great hobby and can be a ton of fun. You meet cool people and exercise your creativity but it can also be a huge time suck that doesn’t necessarily deserve your time. It SHOULD fit into your life and CHANGE along with you. I think you have the exact right attitude towards it.

    Hope to see you soon Darling. Are you doing any BlogHer stuff?

    • 7
      The Mommyologist says:

      Thanks, Jill! Things have changed so much, so trying to figure out how to balance it all. I would love to see you soon too! No BlogHer for me, but should get back to the city sometime in August. I haven’t been down since May…things have just been so nuts here! Hope you are well and would love to catch up soon! xo

  5. 8
    Sonya M says:

    Amen!! You have your priorities straight. Good for you:) My blog has been slacking too so I know what you mean. 2 business and 2 kids, heck all I want to do is sleep – LOL:) Your Rock!

    • 9
      The Mommyologist says:

      Thank you for understanding! It’s so hard to try and do it all…so having to do the best I can and not worry about it, etc!

  6. 10
    Heather says:

    I say blog whenever you want. If the blogging gods are mad then so be it.

    I think more people need to blog about their older children. Raising older children is a lot harder than raising the little ones (and I might add a little more interesting). I think you can do it in a respectful way, but still tell your stories. Besides your little guy will cherish those memories you write down between the ages of 6-18 because let’s face it between working and mothering and everything else you aren’t going to remember much about it!

    • 11
      The Mommyologist says:

      Yeah…just totally conflicted as to how to go about it, but we’ll see! I’m going to take the days as they come and do what I can and see what happens!

  7. 12
    IASoupMama says:

    That has always been my philosophy. I’ll blog when I have something interesting to say (unless I’m getting pain, then I’ll blog when my deadline tells me to blog), but I’m not going to miss life to write about it. That philosophy hasn’t really gained me any readers, but I’m OK with that. I really am.

  8. 14
    Mandy says:

    I love the Stir! I will still keep you in my feed for those moments when you just damn well wanna blog. Best wishes!

  9. 16
    nmaha says:

    Go live your real life lady. The internet will be waiting when you need a break from the fun :-)

  10. 18
    Nolie says:

    We got to live our offline life first always. The blog is there when you are ready.

  11. 19
    Tina says:

    Totally on your team…and way to go girl!

  12. 20
    Karen says:

    Better to live your life and be present in the moment than to blog about it and lose the moment. Sounds like you have your priorities straight, Mary!

  13. 21
    Susan says:

    Your post totally reflected an issue I’ve been struggling with too. I really like blogging but worry that I’ll reveal too much about my daughters’ lives, ages 6 and 9. It’s hard to know where to draw the line sometimes.You had some really good insight. Thanks!

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